welcome to love, milk & honey.

What a wonderful Tuesday!  I’m guest posting over on my dear friend Shalyn’s blog today all about how to kick a busy work week in the booty and I’m already feeling the love from her blog readers!!  How fun! If you’ve landed over here from her page, WELCOME!!!  Love, Milk & Honey is all about helping you grow flourishing relationships, namely marriage.  I kind of feel like you coming here for the first time is us being on our first date.  Since you can’t see me…I’ll put the questions to rest:  I’m wearing something fabulous (out of Shay’s closet… that girl’s got some STYLE!), my hair is perfectly coiffed, and I opened all the doors for you, ok?  :)  Seriously, though… so glad you made it to my end of the blog block.  I hope you come back again soon!

Last week I got a chance to listen to the Singing Men of North Central Texas in concert.  My dad has been a member of the Singing Men choirs wherever we have lived across Texas for as long as I can remember and I have always loved going to their concerts.  As I sat there and listened, I let the music sink into my soul.  The Lord spoke to me in such a beautiful way through a song by Cindy Berry titled “He will Quiet You.”

Often times in life, the voices of our hearts are quieted.  Sometimes by negative things such as hurt or uncertainty.  And other times by positive things like the peace that comes from the Lord or just the sheer awe from wonderful experiences.  I feel I have been in a season of quietness lately.  Not all of it has been from negative influence, although it did start with hurt and unreleased bitterness, I more feel as if it’s just been a time for me to empty myself and listen more than I speak.  But, in all my human brokenness, the quiet has sometimes made me feel inadequate.  There are so many people around me blowing and going in their business, making big life changes, having babies, making “noise” of sorts… and here I am… falling off the grid into silence.  But at this concert the other night, it all made sense.  I wasn’t feeling the need to quiet the restlessness because of my own inadequacies or because I had forgotten the words to my life’s song; and that quietness certainly wasn’t causing me to fall short.  But I was in a period of silence because the Lord was literally quieting me with His Love.  It wasn’t an accident, I hadn’t lost myself.  Very much the opposite!  My purpose was being redirected and I needed to be quiet in order to be prepared.  I picture Him gesturing for me to crawl up into His lap and just let it all go.  Rest.  And just be on the receiving end of His love.

It’s an odd thing to wrap your head around… someone quieting you with their love. With their words or their actions maybe, but with their love?  The power of that is just baffling to me!  I don’t think I would have been able to grasp it had I not gone through this season.  There’s no way I would have known what it felt like for the Lord to literally quiet your soul… but now I can say, my goodness, what a beautiful Lord we have and what magnificent, whole love He gives us.  He saw me where I was, took hold of me and all my shortcomings and loved on me until all my words had been spoken, all my worries had been released and my heart had begun to mend.  Could you imagine loving someone so well that it quieted them?  Quieted their restlessness and eased their burdens?  But it doesn’t stop there.  The next part of this song and the verse it is based on (Zephaniah 3:17) is that the Lord will rejoice over you.  Oh, to have the creator rejoice… over me… is such a humbling picture in my head.  How unworthy we are but how merciful He is.  What a sweet reminder of the joy that comes from rebuilding and how much it touches the Lord’s heart just as much as it changes ours.  That connection with the Father is so sacred I feel as though I should almost speak in whispers as I describe it.  His love doesn’t stop when we doubt.  It isn’t hindered by our worry.  It isn’t limited to our understanding.  It breathes LIFE!

I want my love to be like that.  I want to strive, as much as my human-ness will let me, to love James in a way that meets his heart exactly where it is, loves him in that season, helps carry the burdens, rejoices in the triumphs, and gives him the very best of myself and my heart.  Because what the Lord has done for me in loving me that way has left an unshakeable impression inside my soul.  And I’m so glad it has.

gorgeous print of this verse found in  Fancy That Design House’s Etsy Shop

I’ve written quite a bit lately about the storms of life and what it looks like to weather them.  Today, as it poured rain all afternoon, it dawned on me that instead of battening down the hatches and running in fear when the storm clouds roll in; maybe sometimes we need just stand in the rain.  Let it truly soak us to the core… feel what it is we’ve been holding back, hiding from, and avoiding.  Just take a moment and stop.  Stop the pretenses, stop the coping, stop letting the fear take hold of us.  Because, as hard as it is to remember when the thick of the storm is on top of you, it will pass.  And rain is just water, thunder is just noise, and lightning truly is a brilliant display from the Lord of the Universe who is also the keeper of your heart.

We’ve spoken to our youth group a lot about purity lately and each time I dig into it with them, I consistently find my thoughts deep in a memory I lived 9 years ago.  I’m deathly afraid of storms.  I have been since I was 8 years old and had to crouch into a closet with my very pregnant mother while my dad was out of town and a tornado ripped through our town.  But one day, my high school best friend and I had endured a pretty ruthless day of typical teenage drama so we ignored the storm clouds rolling in and headed to Sonic to get a coke.  On our way home the clouds opened up and it came a downpour.  My normal reaction was to beeline it to my house, stay near the TV so I could hear the weather reports, and hide.  But this particular day, Kristen and I threw caution to the wind and headed to the city park rather than to our houses.  We hopped out of my little red honda civic, fully dressed in school clothes, no umbrellas, and just played in the rain.  We jumped in puddles, we ran around the car, we sang, we danced, and we laughed ourselves right out of the dreary day and into a place of peace.  Wet peace but peace all the same.

I have no doubt that memory being on my mind lately is not a coincidence.  I think it has served as a way for the Lord to remind me that maybe when life storms come along, we aren’t always supposed to run and hide.  Maybe we are meant to stand in them… to BE in them.  To let them cleanse us of the impurities the world makes us carry, strip away the desires of our flesh, and re-focus us on the beauty and the fullness of life.

I’m a dreamer, always have been.  I’d lie awake as a little girl thinking up fantasy lands and planning out my reign as heroine in them.  My parents raised me to believe I could be anything or anyone I wanted to be; the hardest thing was whittling it all down to my final choice.  I love them for raising me in that mindset and intend to teach my kids the same should I have any; but I’ve also come to realize that dreams aren’t all there is to the equation.  When it comes to becoming, dreaming is only one step of the process.  In my best dreams, I’m an excellent wife, homemaker, blogger, friend, and daughter.  In reality, I struggle with keeping all those plates spinning and keeping my head on straight.  I think it has taken me being in the “adult” world to realize that there is a whole lot more doing than dreaming involved in living a full life.

For me, my best self comes out when I set goals, follow a consistent schedule, keep a clean home, and get out of the house every once in a while!  So what holds me back from doing all those things on a regular basis?  Well, to be totally honest, myself.  Can I get an Amen?  Anyone else get in their own way sometimes?  I have some incredibly unrealistic expectations that I can do it all while sleeping in and living in my pajamas and waking up looking like a supermodel.  That just isn’t the case.  To make the dreams that I have come true, it takes doing.  Consistent, diligent doing.

What dreams of yours have been sacrificed or forgotten due to your lack of “doing”?  What’s stopping you from making a plan right now and sticking to it?  Let’s make a pact to push past those things this week!  The end of waiting until tomorrow, waiting until the time is right, or just waiting period comes now.

Here’s to doing!

You know the feeling :: big, dark, clouds rolling in that both leave you in awe and make you tremble to your core.  They seem to keep building, growing, and become all-consuming.  They obscure your vision of the horizon and leave you paralyzed in panic.  You’re out of control and have no idea when things will return to normal.  All you can do is wait it out and hope the damage left in it’s wake isn’t irrepairable.

Lately, I’ve been witness to many people navigating storms.  Big, gross, scary life storms.  28 year old mom with cancer storms, teenage girl with epilepsy storms, a young couple miscarrying for the 4th time storms, husband leaving his wife storms.  Storms that require shelter and leave damage that spans for miles and miles.  It’s made me feel so heavy lately… just burdened with sadness and questions and really in tune with how messy and broken life truly is.  I can’t help but think that some of you may feel the same whether you are personally in the midst of a storm or just been witness to one.

When we were breathed into existence, there was no manual that came alongside our birth certificate letting us know what to do when things got rough.  Our coping mechanisms come both from life experiences and the advice of others.  And sometimes, that’s just not enough.  Days become marathons and happiness feels far-fetched.

This morning while I was teaching sunday school to the girls in our youth group, we studied the integrity of God.  The second point in the “how God demonstrates His integrity” series was this :: God keeps His promises.  One of the exercises in our lesson was to read through a few of the promises God made in the old testament and then skip forward to the new testament to see the fulfillment of His promises.  Time after time, scripture after scripture, the Lord gently reminded me that His love is magnificent and he promises to never leave us in our storms.  You see, we only know of human relationships so we can’t possibly grasp what it means to be loved so wholly as God loves us but this morning I feel like He sent me a little glimpse.  God’s promise to bring us through the storms isn’t contingent on us knowing how to eloquently ask for help or our ability to brave it out and be tough.  All it requires of us is trust because His strength is made PERFECT in our weakness.  Did you catch that?  It’s not our strength that calls the God of the universe to our side, it’s our weakness.  He doesn’t want us to hide our inabilities he wants us to bare them in the knowledge that He finds our need for Him beautiful.  We’ve all heard the verse in Romans 8 where the Lord declares that he has plans for our good but back up a bit and read the part leading into that scripture with me…

“But if we hope for what is still unseen by us, we wait for it with patience and composure. So too the [Holy] Spirit comes to our aid and bears us up in our weakness; for we do not know what prayer to offer nor how to offer it worthily as we ought, but the Spirit Himself goes to meet our supplication and pleads in our behalf with unspeakable yearnings and groanings too deep for utterance. And He Who searches the hearts of men knows what is in the mind of the [Holy] Spirit [what His intent is], because the Spirit intercedes and pleads [before God] in behalf of the saints according to and in harmony with God’s will. We are assured and know that God [being a partner in their labor] all things work together and are [fitting into a plan] for good to and for those who love God and are called according to [His] design and purpose.” – Romans 8:25-28 (AMP)”

HE is enough, sweet friends.  Did you hear that?  HE IS ENOUGH.  The same God of the storms in the sky is the God of peace like a river.  Call on His name.  The storms will still come and there still may be confusion and damage and fear more often than you’d like but you aren’t alone.  You will never be alone.

“Do you not know? Have you not heard?  The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.  He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” – Isaiah 40:28-31

Soar this week on the strength of the Lord.

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I like to speak a lot about the positives of marriage.  The good times, the growing closer times and the ah ha! moment times.  But reality is those moments don’t add up to make the full 100% of your married days.  What happens when those times are few and far between… or maybe when they become just a memory?  Or what if you’re teetering dangerous close to the edge of losing it?  It doesn’t have to be a monumental occurrence to foster hurt feelings or to encourage distance between you and your spouse.  Sometimes it’s a lot of little things that just fill up all the space around you, close in, and suffocate the life right out of your marriage.  What happens then?

Well, first, take a breath.  I can’t promise you it will all be okay by your standards, but I can promise you that while this whole situation may come as a surprise to you, God isn’t the least bit caught off guard or surprised.  He is Sovereign.  He is on His throne.  And He will not leave you during your time of trial.  You are also not the only one who has ever hit a rough spot.  Be it a mountain or a mole hill, you aren’t the only one traveling that road.

Where does the life of your marriage come from?  Where is it rooted?  Deeper than that, though, where are YOU rooted.  Your actions, reactions and thoughts are crucial always but especially in times of trial.  Self doubt, jealousy, bitterness and anger will likely be present but allowing them to be present and allowing them to dictate your ability to reason are two different things.  You cannot control what your spouse does so take a moment right now to let go of the idea that you might be able to. Realize, though, you can adjust your self to help create an environment where your spouse might feel more comfortable and clarity might come a bit easier for you both.  The life of your marriage should come from both a personal relationship with Christ as well as a marital commitment to serve Christ.  Odds are, if things feel like they are falling apart one of those two things have been compromised.  It doesn’t mean you or your spouse are a terrible person it just means that the devil has found a foothold.

Fight back.  When we stand face to face with our spouse on our wedding day, we share vows.  Those vows exist to ground us.  To bring reality to our love. Sickness, health, better, worse, rich, poor, etc. etc.  You promised your spouse not just that you would be around for those things but that you would LOVE them through those times.  That you would experience it with them and give them the very best of you through it all.  So why is it so hard to do that when push comes to shove?  Because it hurts.  Whether it’s at the fault of yourself or your spouse, it hurts.  But friend, I’ll tell you like my best friend tells me, the sooner you forgive the sooner the bitterness melts away and the compassion begins to settle in.  Forgive without needing justification or even to prove your point.  Fight for what you have by armoring yourself with grace, forgiveness, compassion, humility, love, patience and servant hood.

If today you find yourself in the middle of a rut, or feeling like quite a bit around you is broken just remember that you serve a God who is bigger than it all.  He is mighty to save and He is enough.  Cling to that even if nothing else makes sense.  And in case you need a reminder in a different way, Sandi Patty and Heather Payne have a song that touches me to the core and always brings me hope.  I hope it does the same for you today.

Lately I’ve been on the search for the perfect, new-to-me element to add to our home’s decor.  I tend to change decorating styles on a whim so I wanted something that wouldn’t break the bank but would also pack a little punch.  I think (with the help of pinterest and a few fun blogs) I have found just the thing that might add a little fun to our living room.  Maps!  I love dreaming about travels we will take in the future so what better way to prepare for the spring dreaming season than adding a bit of geographical inspiration to our home?!  Here are a few of my absolute favorite ways maps can take center stage in your decor too!

I can’t get over the heart garland made out of maps.  I really, really love the different color and layers of it.  And, being the sucker for love related things, the we met. we married. we live. DIY art in the bottom left makes my heart so happy.  If you can’t tell from the picture above, you cut a heart shaped section of the city you met in, married in and currently live in.  Pop them in a frame with labels and voila!  Your very own geographical love story!  And who wouldn’t love to pay homage to their travels with a beautiful silver pushpin on a map of the whole world like the picture in the middle row shows?  I can’t get over those silver push pins!  Anyone know where I can get some?  What are some of your favorite decorating ideas using maps?  I’m all ears!

Visit my Pinterest board here for all the sources and how-to’s of these map lovelies!

Cowboy boots are by far the best shoes in the world. the. best.

I have entirely too many pictures of my dogs on instagram.  It’s beginning to be ridiculous.

God invented carbs for Mondays.  And put wonderful people in our church who give us a homemade loaf of bread often for particular Mondays when sanity seems out of reach.

I missed my car when she was sick…I’ve been caught hugging her two or three times in the last week and I’m not ashamed in the least. The picture is of the hubbs and my car when we arrived at the awesome cabin we stayed at for our honeymoon!

Jammed fingers hurt.  And they strangely begin to resemble purple vienna sausages after a day or so. Ew.

Ty (our boxer) has an insatiable sweet tooth.  Especially when it comes to birthday cakes I have slaved over.

Fresh grated parmesan cheese makes the world go round… and homemade alfredo sauce taste amazing!

What do you think today?

It’s recipe time!  On today’s menu is the Asian inspired shrimp recipe I’ve been gabbing about all week.  I have to admit that my initial idea for this recipe came from the Pioneer Woman episode I watched this past weekend.  If you don’t watch her show, you really should!  She made some delicious looking wings with Asian sauce on her latest episode and I just can’t get it out of my mind!.  I’m not a wing eater (I know, I know) so I wanted to find something I could add that scrumptious asian flare to.  I settled on shrimp and am SO glad I did!  Hope you are too!

If you didn’t grab the market list on Monday, hop over here and grab it so you will know the ingredients you need.

First things first, get that shrimp thawing and preheat the oven to 350!  If you aren’t a shrimp person but are intrigued, make this recipe your own!  I have no doubt this sauce will be excellent on just about any meat you can find.  Well, maybe not just any meat… but you know what I mean.

On to the sauce making!  I started by combining 1 cup of peach jam and 1 cup pineapple juice.  Make sure they are combined well and the jam has turned liquid-y then go ahead and add all other liquid ingredients – 2 tablespoons worcestershire, 1 tablespoon vinegar, and 1/4 cup soy sauce.  Give them a good stir.

Now it’s time to add the good stuff.  Throw in a pressed garlic clove (2 if you live on the wild side), 1/4 cup brown sugar, 2 tablespoons crushed red pepper and half a cup chopped water chestnuts.  Be sure the liquid stays below a boil and stir vigorously over medium heat to be sure all the brown sugar work’s it’s way into the sauce.

Set the sauce aside and cook your shrimp (or other meat) in a skillet with a touch of olive oil.  Be careful not to overcook the meat!  When it is about 3/4 of the way cooked, add in  half the sauce and be sure everything gets really well coated.  Then spread the coated meat on a cookie sheet and stick it in the over for about 10 minutes on 350 degree heat.  This will be sure the meat is finished cooking and the sauce is cooked into the meat.

Place it all in a serving dish and pour the rest of the sauce right over the top.  Then breathe it all in and prepare yourself for some amazing flavor.

Let me know what you think and how you made this sauce your own, I’d love to hear!

This morning started as most mornings do, I grumbled as my alarm started its beaconing wondering how much longer I could stay nestled into the covers without making myself run behind. My little Ollie pup heard the alarm too and he didn’t plan on letting me forget it anytime soon.  I gave into the yips coming from the kennel, threw back the covers and rubbed my eyes.

Something you need to know about our room…it’s DARK. We’re talking black sun screen mesh on the outside of the window then blinds and blackout curtains on the inside. I could nap at 2 in the afternoon and it will look no different than it does at midnight. Most of the time, this rocks, but this morning, when I’m trying to navigate to the bathroom, let the pups out and get dressed for the gym, and keep the room dark for my sleeping husband, it was a nightmare. I stubbed my toe on randomly strewn shoes at least three times, ran into the door jamb and finally resorted to crawling around to find my running shoes. I tried using my cell phone for light but it felt a lot like throwing a firefly in the air and pretending it’s a firework.  It felt like the darkness was everywhere.

As I sat and put on the shoes that I (finally) found, the Lord started speaking to my heart.  Some people choose to live in spiritual darkness just as thick as the physical darkness I battled this morning.  Some use it as a cloak to cover the sin in their lives, some are there because it’s where people have pushed them to stay through hurtful words or actions, and others choose it because the light is, undoubtedly, telling.  Every obstacle that I not so gracefully dealt with this morning would have still been there had the light been on but I would have been able to see each of them.  I could have stepped over those shoes I left in the middle of the floor, walked through the door without nailing my shoulder on it, and found my running shoes without having to resort crawling around.  That’s what makes living in the light so different.  It doesn’t mean things will be easy and no obstacles will cross your path, it means you have an ally.

Let’s choose to live in the light.  No more hiding in the darkness, falling into our own traps.  Be bold, be courageous and give yourself a chance to face obstacles that are flooded in the light of Christ that brings clarity and peace rather than obscured by the darkness.